A Bad Habit

(Not great......but each exercise brings me closer to being better. Indulge me a bit.)

 

I Once Desired Kindness

And sometimes I still do

But earth inhabits cruelty

Seems nothing else will do

I used to look for beauty

Aesthetically pleased

But in the realest moments

Twas blackness all I sees

I once worked for all harmony

The risks my hope did take

Stark melody took over

For every human's sake

I used to bite my finger nails.....

I once thought I knew quite abit

How silly of me really

I once thought I could write well

But that was also silly

I've tried not not to like this place

It seems a little bleak

The grayness clouds my face some

The more I give and seek.

I once would bite each finger nail...

I worked (once) with many broken,

They sought me out to talk

But I tried much too hard then

To crutch each broken walk.

I felt a little lonely once, 

But I had many friends

They did not know me very well

Despite communal ends

I tried hard to explain myself

To analyze each thought

I color-labelled every mood, 

Each dispositive thought.

I used to bite each finger nail......

I worked hard to describe myself

In this too much was spent

I haven't kicked this habit yet

I'll let it go for Lent.

Self analyzing, my addiction

I can't do without

My mind, my heart, my character,

Morality, my doubt.

I used to bite my finger nails, on them I used to chew--

I used to bite each finger nail,

--but this one I still do.

Wailing Wall

If they did know how much I hated them

They would not seek me out to be their friend

And I as utter isolation found

Would be content in water till I drown

And wake the dead from underneath the seas

And swim them up from all of their disease

And on and on the tide would flow and flow

And on and on, would flow and flow and flow

And ice and rain and snow and snow and snow

Would wash me over in that flow, that flow

If Chopin watched me listen to his prose

Jump up and down those keys and keys and notes, 

He'd see me cry and mist and tear and tense

Within my stable kept behind the fence

And I would let those tears just flow and flow

If he could only know, if he could only know.

If stars could breath me in as I breath them

They'd taste a bit of their own sweet heaven

And swallow dust of bone and flesh and mind

And heart and soul and all that them does bind.

And heart and light would travel on and on

Together through infinity's beyond.

And all is well, and all is well, and all

Is well and well while Wailing at the Wall.